QuoteLog

“Beauty is only skin deep, and the world is full of thin skinned people.”

“I’m an old woman’s wish and a young woman’s dream.”

“Everywhere I go, I’m asked if the universities stifle writers. My opinion is that they don’t stifle enough of them.”

“The battle for the mind of Ronald Reagan was like the trench warfare of World War I: never have so many fought so hard for such barren terrain.”

“Sure, we want to go home. We want this war over with. The quickest way to get it over with is to go get the bastards who started it.”

“If war isn’t underway by the beginning of autumn, George W. Bush might as well nickname himself President Juan Term.”

“Strategy without tactics is the slowest route to victory. Tactics without strategy is the noise before defeat.”

“The warblogger world is more diverse than it appears, but it has one unifying meme: Never again. This used to be the oath of the Jews, but it’s shared now by millions who saw the towers tumble.”

“Like weary Brezhnev-era Muscovites, the American moviegoing public will line up out of habit and compulsion, ruefully hoping that this episode will at least be a little better than the last one, and perhaps inwardly suspecting that the whole elephantine system is rotten.”

“The reporters want the Big Story, their own Watergate. They’ll try to get it out of something as ridiculous as a blowjob in the Oval Office, and they’re equally happy -- delighted, really -- to turn a savage mass murder by savage terrorists into a White House scandal.”

“It was inevitable, I suppose, that sooner or later terrorism would become bad performance art.”

“But to lazy reporters, the world of blogs represents their worst nightmare: It’s an endless parade of experts in every conceivable subject they might write about, all equipped with Internet-style megaphones ready to pounce on errors.”

“Just heard about Blogger on Vatican Radio last night.”

“I’d harbored hopes that the intelligence that once inhabited novels or films would ingest rock. I was, perhaps, wrong.”

“The mere act of creating a public entity, however accidental, re-wires your brain, and makes previously impossible fantasies seem like amusing challenges.”

“If you don’t have a sense of humor, you’ll hurt yourself getting angry at me.”

“To be Ozzy Osbourne, it could be worse. I could be Sting.”

“Do you think Jesus would love me? I’m a Muslim, but do you think Jesus would love me... I think Jesus would have a drink with me and discuss... why you acting like that? Now, he would be cool. He would talk to me. No Christian ever did that and said in the name of Jesus even... They’d throw me in jail and write bad articles about me and then go to church on Sunday and say Jesus is a wonderful man and he’s coming back to save us. But they don’t understand that when he comes back, that these crazy greedy capitalistic men are gonna kill him again.”

“It’s theft. Your contract with the network when you get the show is you’re going to watch the spots. Otherwise you couldn’t get the show on an ad-supported basis. Any time you skip a commercial or watch the button you’re actually stealing the programming.”

“Advertising is found in societies which have passed the point of satisfying the basic animal needs.”

“If Clear Channel talks about free markets, they should have their heads dunked into a toilet bowl.”

“In the future, everyone will be Hitler for 15 minutes.”

“I have a 9 year old son who thinks he is a singing, dancing, hockey playing Jesus. I do nothing to discourage this idea. I have a 12 year old daughter who thinks I am the stupidest person on the face of the earth. I perpetuate this notion by acting like an idiot in front of her friends for my own amusement.”

“O’Reilly calls himself a newsman, but he’s being too modest. In reality, he’s America’s favorite carnival barker, with guests who disagree with him as his sideshow.”

“These silly people will do anything the director suggests because they want to be on television. They want to be somebody! I say, take ‘em and put ‘em in the Congo for four days -- see how they do over there.”