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Sun
Jan
03

2010

Breaking A Four Decade Hex

The hex is over. No, not the “Hex of the ‘Naughts,” the decade of 2000-2009 that so recently ended. This is a much longer hex. Four years ago, I wrote about what was at that time The Thirty Nine Year Hex

Today, this hex turned the Atlanta Falcons into a sad puddle of loser. Again.

... » Full Article, 442 words »

Fri
Jun
12

2009

The Release of Michael Vick

A couple of weeks back the federal prison system released Michael Vick into their halfway house program. However, the program is so full that Vick had to be released to his own 4500 square foot home with an ankle bracelet. And the question became, will he get a second chance? Not at freedom, that’s a given. I mean a second chance to earn millions as an NFL player.

... » Full Article, 672 words »

Mon. Dec 29, 2008

Falcons Explode Expectations

At the beginning of 2008, the Atlanta Falcons had no general manager, no head coach, and no incumbent starting quarterback. They had little more than the Number Three pick in the April 2008 draft, and one huge toxic cloud, generated by perhaps the worst season in professional sports history. They were the Union Carbide of the NFL, the Bhopal Falcons.

Before the season began, The Sporting News predicted these Foul Falcons would win one game out of sixteen. As it turns out, that wouldn’t have even gotten them the first pick in the 2009 draft, thanks to the woe-and-sixteen Detroit Lions.

Instead, the Falcons clinched a spot in the playoffs. Which is not a sentence anyone thought they would be writing this year.

» Read the Full Article (1208 words) »

Sun. Sep 07, 2008

The Circus Left Town

Last season for the Atlanta Falcons, well, it was like a surreal nightmare from which you could not wake. First we discovered Michael Vick is a Lying Dog Murdering Team Betraying Anti Role Model, followed by the ugly season of the The Atlanta Btfsplk’s that went on and on and on. And then it got even worse when Coach Loser quit with 3 games left in the season.

But Sunday, in about 3 hours these guys wearing the uniform of the Atlanta Falcons (as in, “who are these guys?”) made you wonder if maybe it was all just a really bad dream.

» Read the Full Article (759 words) »

Thu
Mar
06

2008

Football Departures

Favre as Falcon

Hey, what’s with the photo of a very youthful and vital looking Brett Favre … in a Falcons uniform? Didn’t he just retire? Have the Falcon’s drafted Brett’s son? Has Reid been dipping into the Photoshop again?

... » Full Article, 627 words »

Sat
Feb
23

2008

MeAngelo Drops An Ego Bomb On His New Bosses

If you’re a regular reader here, you may recall my opinions (1, 2) about current Atlanta Falcons cornerback DeAngelo Hall. But Mr. Hall has a couple of new bosses in GM Thomas Dimitroff and head coach Mike Smith, who may not be as familiar with Mr. Hall’s methods. So he gave them an introduction:

... » Full Article, 71 words »

Fri
Jan
25

2008

New Bosses For The Birds

So the Falcons hired a GM I’ve never heard of, who proceeded to hire a coach I’ve never heard of, to attempt to resurrect the team after a season worse than anyone has ever heard of.

... » Full Article, 277 words »

Wed
Dec
19

2007

Tuna Time In Atlanta?

After the debacle of their quitter coach, I expected maybe the Falcons would come out last Sunday and show us something. They did. They showed their ass, in another undisciplined 30 point defeat. It placed an exclamation point at the end of “Yes, this is certainly the worst season ever!” Afterwards, I wondered what act could turn this around in anything less than three years.

... » Full Article, 473 words »

Tue
Dec
11

2007

Losers Quit

As this year began, the Falcons not only had one of the top quarterbacks in the NFL, they also had a damn fine backup quarterback, and they claimed they’d also finally hired the man to coach them, one Bobby Petrino.

On Monday, that “top quarterback” stood before a judge in a black and white jumpsuit and got sentenced to 23 months in jail, their damn fine backup is starting for Houston, and viewers who tuned in for prime time football got sentenced to watching yet another sorry performance by the puddle of misery the Falcons have become on their way to a 3-10 record.

... » Full Article, 858 words »

Mon
Nov
19

2007

The Atlanta Btfsplks, Week Ten

It’s been seven weeks since I last wrote about the local NFL franchise I now call The Atlanta Btfsplks. Three of those seven weeks, they managed to not lose a game.

... » Full Article, 453 words »

Sun. Sep 30, 2007

Petrino Wins, But Me D. Needs More Love

I guess it seems like this site has been Football Central lately, but the truth is [1] my workflow is on the “firehose” setting, leaving little discretionary brain power for posting here, and [2] for the Falcons, the past five months or so have been a testosterone-filled soap opera, a Man Drama of epic proportions: “Can the Falcons new QB keep being The Little Joey That Could? Will Bobby and DeAngelo throw down in the locker room, or kiss and make up? And what about Ookie? Tune in next week on … As The Birds Turn...”

» Read the Full Article (1117 words) »

Sun
Sep
23

2007

The DeAngelo Btfsplks, Week Three

In a striking contrast to the last two weeks (1, 2), the Atlanta offense began to come together this Sunday. The previously moribund Joey Harrington had a fine outing, 31 of 44 for 361 yards and 2 touchdowns. He did plenty to win. So did the offensive line, who only allowed one sack after allowing 13 the past two weeks.

... » Full Article, 759 words »

Sun
Sep
16

2007

The Atlanta Btfsplks, Week Two

Take one defensive battle resulting in a low scoring game, throw in a first year kicker who misses two field goals, one a gimme, liberally mix in seven sacks (13 now in two weeks), plus a second sub-100 yard rushing effort, and you’ve got The Atlanta Btfsplks ... Week Two.

... » Full Article, 225 words »

Sun
Sep
09

2007

The Atlanta Btfsplk's

I’m thinking it may be time to change the name of the Atlanta Falcons to the Atlanta Btfsplk’s. Why Btfsplk’s? “Joe Btfsplk is very simply the world’s biggest jinx. He walks around with a perpetually dark rain cloud a foot over his head. Once he appears on any scene, dreadfully bad luck befalls anyone in his vicinity.”

... » Full Article, 584 words »

Mon
Aug
27

2007

This Week Vick, Next Week Snakes And Gators

I suppose this site has seemed like “Vick Central” lately, and to help wrap that up, I thought I’d make a trip down to the Georgia Dome tonight, to take in the atmosphere before the first home game of the Falcons preseason, and maybe bring back a few interesting photos.

I can sum up that atmosphere in two words: hot and boring. There were supposedly going to be some “protests” by those supporting Vick, and some by those against him. For forty five minutes I walked around outside the Dome, hitting each of the four corners of that very big block, looking “off property” for any nearby activity. I saw about a dozen media trucks, with satellite dishes or microwave towers, but very little for them to cover outside the Dome.

... » Full Article, 680 words »

Fri
Aug
24

2007

Vick Tries To Pull A Clinton

The attempted spin on events was clear from the moment the news hit the wires Friday afternoon. The word was that Michael Vick would plead guilty, but would not outright admit to either gambling or killing dogs. Talking heads with legal degrees were saying this was a major coup by Vick’s lawyers.

Steve Sadow, a prominent Atlanta defense attorney who has followed the case, said he believes Vick’s attorneys agreed to the careful phrasing in the summary of facts to help them with their negotiations with the NFL and for public relations.

... » Full Article, 1155 words »

Tue. Aug 21, 2007

Michael Vick is a Lying Dog Murdering Team Betraying Anti Role Model

America is an amazingly forgiving country, especially when it comes to those we call “celebrities.” If people already like you, and maybe even irrationally feel like they “know” you, you can stand in front of them and sincerely say … “I do not know what I was thinking when I had carnal relations with that farm animal, I sincerely apologize to all farm animals, and I am entering a 12 step program to deal with my farm animal issues; it will never ever happen again” ... and people will eventually “forgive” you!

Oh, sure, they’ll make their jokes on the late night talk shows, there may be some Photoshopped photos passed around the blogs, and the occasional person on the street may walk up behind you and say “Baa-aa-aa-aah,” but they’ll let you continue doing what they liked you for originally. Eventually. Because you quickly and sincerely apologized for being such an idiot, and there’s not a one of us that hasn’t done something stupid we regret, even if it didn’t involve livestock.

Or, you could choose to remain completely silent until your case is resolved, showing all the facts in open court.

Or, you could take the route Michael Vick did. Lie, at every opportunity, for months.

» Read the Full Article (2956 words) »

Sun
Aug
19

2007

A Tale of 3 QB's

At the end of the Falcons season a mere nine months ago, their quarterback chart showed perhaps as strong a combo of quarterbacks as you’d find on any NFL team. So how are those same three QB’s doing now?

Today, Matt Schaub is the starter in Houston.

... » Full Article, 120 words »

Sat. Aug 18, 2007

Vick's Longest Yard

I just finished watching a very dated 33 year old movie, The Longest Yard. In part, it involves a football player who lets his teammates down with his illegal acts. He ends up in jail, his career ruined, and his reputation in tatters. And it most definitely made me think of Michael Vick, especially given events earlier in the day: “Falcons quarterback Michael Vick’s NFL career is stuck in limbo as his remaining two co-defendants cut deals with prosecutors Friday, leaving him to face federal dog fighting charges alone [...] On Friday, co-defendants Quanis Phillips, 28, of Atlanta, and Purnell Peace, 35, of Virginia Beach, pleaded guilty to a single count of conspiracy related to dog fighting, joining a third co-defendant Tony Taylor, 34, of Hampton, Va., who entered a guilty plea last month.”

Though Friday passed with no announcement of a plea deal for Vick, and there is even a rumor afloat he’s going to refuse any deal, it sounds like the evidence against him is mounting in a big way.

» Read the Full Article (1034 words) »

Tue
Aug
14

2007

Vick's Lucky Number Is No Longer Seven

There’s some major ongoing developments in the Michael Vick case. And you might say the AJC buries the lead, nine paragraphs deep, wrapped in understatement: “This week, Vick learned that in the criminal justice system, friendship only goes so far.”

Because his “buds” are about to turn him out as a liar, and worse:

... » Full Article, 539 words »

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