twittered:
Patience is a virtue
Twitter demands it.
blogged:
Fri. Dec 28, 2007
TiVo Made My Head Explode
When you step outside the arena of computers and cameras, our home is surprisingly lacking in high tech devices that are common in many homes. We have not even one iPod between the two of us. No PDA’s or iPhones or smart phones or bluetooth ear bugs. We don’t “text message” anyone. No GPS devices or mobile navigation systems. Technologically, we are in many ways virtual Neanderthals.
And, for the most part, we’re fine with it (though I foresee an iPhone or two in our future when our current cell phone contract expires next spring). But Susan had been whining for expressed a wish for a TiVo. And she did it long enough ago that by Christmas morning, she had forgotten about it. So it was a very good gift.
Until I had to set it up.
Wed
Sep
19
2007
Boom Times In The Comedy Industry
It’s been a booming year for the comedy industry, already flush from the antics of Spears and Lohan, coffers overflowing with presidential candidates presenting about three dozen individual feet that might get swallowed by a runaway mouth on most any day, with a dollop of some foot-tapping bathroom follies for dessert. Yes, it’s been good times.
Fri
Sep
07
2007
Dreams of Propaganda Inadequacy
I had a dream last night. In this dream, I found out why Osama bin Laden’s beard looks so different in the “new” photo from the upcoming video. He had shaved it off in order to disguise his appearance, but had a false one put on for the video so his “followers” would recognize him. In the video, he revealed the reason he required such drastic disguise measures was because we was now … in America. And preparing to martyr himself.
Mon
Aug
06
2007
They Were, And We Are, Mad Men
There’s a guy named Don Draper, creative Director for a Manhattan advertising agency. In his world, everybody smokes, even the doctor when doing a patient exam. People at the agency are drinking by lunchtime. The guy in the art department is gay … and very much in the closet. The rest of the guys are innate chauvinists. The neighborhood divorcée makes all the wives nervous and catty. When Mom sees her little girl playing “astronaut” using the dry cleaning bag as her spacesuit, she gets upset … because she’s worried the girl dirtied Mommy’s freshly cleaned clothes.
Mon
Jan
08
2007
What's That Smell? It's Your News Channel
On Sunday, Fox News ramped up to Code Red when there was some confusion about a truck at the Port of Miami. From the sound of the talking heads on Fox, you’d think the city was about to explode. But ... it turns out it was a simple “miscommunication,” a language problem, and not anything sinister at all. However, it was good for a couple of hours of fair and balanced ScareTV.
Wed
Aug
16
2006
Breaking News Farce
It’s about 11am. I’m working with CNN on in the background, and there’s a “breaking news” flash that a plane flying from London to DC has been diverted to Boston, after three passengers got into a confrontation with the flight crew. That’s the story on CNN and Fox as well, as of about 11:15am.
No, wait, it was just one woman who had an “anxiety attack.”
Fri. Aug 11, 2006
You're On My List
If you’re not a regular watcher of The Colbert Report on Comedy Central, first of all, you’re missing some of the best and most cutting comedy around today, and secondly, the following may not make much sense to you.
And, thirdly, You’re On Notice!
Fri. Dec 09, 2005
Fog of War On Christmas
It’s a terrible time of year to be at war, especially here in our own home land. It dampens the spirit of this time to watch biased babbling heads, er, sparkling news personalities we all love virtually rip out their hair in horror over what claim they see happening.
Americans are bleeding red. And green. It’s important to know (because you may not have seen or heard any evidence of this yourself) ... there’s a War on Christmas.
Tue
Mar
01
2005
Democracy on the March
I don’t normally watch network TV news, but tonight I just happened to catch about two minutes of Peter Jennings on ABC. And it fully reinforced why I don’t bother with network TV news anymore.
Fri. Nov 19, 2004
TV Morals
In a case of cultural auto-cannibalism, in one week our society’s “moral values” were under attack by an Oscar Award winning movie about the sacrifices made in World War II, and the very next week they were assaulted by Monday Night Football.
As a precaution to preserve the few and apparently very fragile moral values that we have left, Thanksgiving has been cancelled, for fear of what might happen next. Our nation’s delicate moral sensibilities simply could not take another blow this quickly.
Thu
Nov
11
2004
Dramatis Interruptus
So I’m watching CSI:NY. The whole CSI Phenomenon hasn’t caught on with me, but I’m trying to give CSI:NY a shot. Because there’s little else on. It’s about 10:55pm.
Fri. Oct 15, 2004
You're Hurting Us
I just watched one of the most genuine heartfelt and hilarious moments I’ve ever seen on CNN. Jon Stewart was appearing with Paul Begala and Tucker Carlson on Crossfire, and he just absolutely lambasted them, repeatedly calling them “partisan hacks,” repeatedly saying, “you’re hurting us.” He said it in his usual non-threatening and jovial tone … but he wasn’t joking. At times his hands were shaking.
I wish I had a tape of it (later: it’s now available for download). It was a classic segment. It was like watching someone say all the things you wanted to say. CNN’s jumbled transcript doesn’t do it justice, but I’ve made an effort to clean it up and offer a lengthy chunk of the excerpts I found striking.
Fri
Feb
13
2004
Canada's War on Racist Puppets
Canada’s War on Racist Puppets – This week, I’ve been watching Conan O’Brien broadcast his show from Toronto each night, and I’ve wondered why he ended up choosing that city. It turns out that the federal and local governments pitched in $1 million to make it happen. Now some of them want that money back, all because of an arrogant hunk of painted plastic on the end of some guy’s arm.
Sun
Dec
07
2003
The Funnier Al
The Funnier Al – Oh, and before I forget, I did make a point of watching Al Sharpton on Saturday Night Live, because he has long proven to be good for a laugh. The opening monologue with Tracey Morgan as the ”Old Al” and the James Brown imitation was decent. But in the end, I’m left saying something I never dreamed I’d say about anyone.
Thu
Jul
24
2003
A Parody of Reality
A Parody of Reality – “...an officer is summoned over the radio to his surprise party with the urgent words, ‘Officer down,’ and enters the darkened motel room gun drawn. He fires, shooting a comrade before anyone can shout out ‘surprise.’ There is a beat, then one of the men picks up his radio and calls, ‘Officer down.’ ”
Wed
May
07
2003
SCREAMING HOT GERALDO
SCREAMING HOT GERALDO – This has got to be the most horrid self serving ALL CAPS piece of crap I’ve seen in quite a while. But then, I don’t frequent Geraldo Rivera’s web site, so this could be the regular fare.
He talks/SCREAMS about “MY INADVERTENT TECHNICAL VIOLATION OF THE PENTAGON’S EMBEDMENT POLICIES,” ... translation; “that wuz when I screwed up, and the commander of the 101st had to kick me out.” He further whines/SCREAMS about how he is “FILLED WITH SMOLDERING ANGER AT THE GROTESQUE EXAGGERATION FOSTERED BY MY CABLE COMPETITORS.”
Wed
Feb
26
2003
Melanie the Storage Medium
Melanie the Storage Medium – If you’ve ever worked a job with odd night hours, you are aware of the vast wasteland the TV can become late at night and early in the morning. And it used to be even worse. Back in the late 70’s, I worked as a DJ doing either the 7pm-12mid shift, or the “graveyard shift,” 12mid-6am. I’d come home to my 13 inch black and white TV, and flip amongst the four or five broadcast stations I could pick up.
Fri
Oct
11
2002
Push Off
Push Off – I was watching a new TV series last night, the only new series of the fall where I haven’t missed a single show, and commented to Susan how I liked it because it was quirky, well directed, and oddly shot. Even the music is cool. This is a highly abnormal reaction for me to have over a new TV series.
Mon
May
06
2002
Reality TV?
Reality TV? – (via Meryl Yourish) You know those times someone ask you a question, you bumble through a reply, and later daydream about the cutting answer you wish you’d given? That’s the way I felt watching a scene in West Wing last week, and Meryl was kind enough to track down and post the transcript. The moment: The character of C.J. Craig, the White House Press Secretary, is asked if she is outraged by the death of Saudi girls who burned to death beacuse the religious police feared they would be seen improperly clothed by ”strangers,” i.e., the firefighters:
Tue
Mar
05
2002
The Osbournes
The Osbournes – It’s official. It’s an absolute hoot. It’s Spinal Tap meets Ozzie & Harriet. Ozzy may be the new Homer Simpson.
"Nearly every sentence spoken by the four contains bleeped profanity, but in some ways the Osbournes are a typical family. Daughter Kelly, for instance, has no patience for her parents, especially when her dad can’t hear her. Ozzy responds, ’You have not been standing in front of 30 billion decibels for 35 years. Write me a note.’ "




